Saturday, August 20, 2005

RED, WHITE AND BLUE - MAKES ME FEEL PURPLE

Since these days the definition of a true patriot is defined by the number of bumper stickers plastered on the back of your car, we here at the Olive Ream, would like to present to you with our own collection of sticky dictums (and no, we are not referring to the duct tapes used by the terrorists), that you can print, paste and promote on your SUV.

- You have the right to bare arms – so wear a sleeveless t-shirt.
- We troop our supports – by tying you up well so you won’t escape.
- You are either with us or you're opting for sanity.
- Land of the free (only for a little while longer)
- Home of the brave (currently being scheduled for demolition)
- Remember 9-11 (but forget about catching Ossama)
- Support the Patriotic Acts (because civil liberties are over-rated)
- In God we trust, (but the feeling is certainly not mutual)
- Spread Freedom & Democracy (by bombing the crap out of other sovereign nations)
- Join the Army (voluntarily or we will draft your sorry ass!)
- Support Israel (if you know what’s good for you)
- United we stand (in our disbelief at the mess the Neocons have created)
- Divided we fall (for the same type of lies repeatedly)
- Support the war on terrorism (with your tax dollars and your life)
- Prey for the troops (they need help in killing insurgents)
- Let freedom ring (just don’t bother answering and it’ll go away)

If you need to feel patriotic at home, we suggest you plop yourself on your sofa, place a family size bucket of buttered popcorn in your lap, and watch the Fox channel. Every time you hear the word ‘terrorist’ you have to chug a pint of Beer. We promise you will be feeling extremely patriotic by the end of the evening.

Not recommended for minors, pregnant women and the clinically sane.

1 Comments:

Blogger Kate-A said...

On point, other than the "United we stand (in our disbelief at the mess the Neocons have created)" as the Democrat congressional lap doggies rolled over and played dead for the Neocon mess. :)

3:12 AM  

Post a Comment

<< Home