Saturday, May 14, 2005

BLOG DISCLAIMER & FAQS

Disclaimer:

This blog is rated PG-13 for sequences of intense violence action and some language. Parents are strongly cautioned. Some material will not be suitable for children under 13 and Bush supporters.

Blog Side effects: Some readers may experience Fatigue, Drowsiness, Nausea, Blurred Vision, Slurred Speech, Tremors, Euphoria, Impairment of Memory, Confusion, Depression, Constipation, Skin Rash, Generalized Exfoliative Dermatitis, Changes in Libido and Loss of Appetite.

The mentioned side effects remain for a short duration of time. However if you feel that they persist for a long period, please view the Fox channel immediately.

FAQs

Writing for this blog has been my first attempt at writing something that has been read by others. I appreciate the fact that a lot of you have actually taken the time out to email me your comments and I thank you for it. The response has been overwhelming but I just wished the messages had not contained so much profanity.

Before I get any more emails regarding the content of this site, let me address your concerns and answer some of your Future Annoying Questions (FAQs).

  • I am the sole author for the drivel on this site, even though the voices in my head tell me otherwise.
  • As to the style of my writing, I never knew I had one.
  • I am aware that my posts might be grammatically incorrect but I think it would be more appropriate to ask me if I give a sh*t. And here’s a ; to prove my point.
  • No, I am not an American, but I might play one on TV for large amounts of cash.
  • Yes, I am aware that Big Brother is watching and he is a bloody voyeuristic pervert and no, I will not stop posting to my blog.
  • No, I do not believe there’s a New World Order but I do believe in the existence of a New World Disorder.
  • Yes, I do like receiving compliments regarding my blog, but I much prefer wire transfers directly to my Swiss bank account.
  • No, I do not support Bush or Blair as they don’t play well with others. My mother warned me about people like them. She said, “Son, beware the minions of the antichrist, for they are quite thick and gittish.” I believe she was talking about them.
  • No, I am not very familiar with star signs, but I think I am ‘Vegetarius’.
  • Yes, there was a specific aim for starting this blog. It was to use the word ‘lugubrious’ in a sentence, and I think I just achieved my aim. Hurray!
  • Finally, for the genius that has emailed me asking for my email address, please seek professional help. In case you can’t afford it, here’s my email address again:

    over underscore email at yahoo dot com

6 Comments:

Blogger Shahid said...

I'm pleased to see that you've got some of those cute buttons and some images on your blog. Much more important than getting "lugubrious" in, that's for sure.

1:28 AM  
Blogger the olive ream said...

Yes, the wee buttons did help add much needed colour to the site. And you're right the word 'lugubrious', it is mouthful and a bit of bastard trying to fit in a sentence without sounding too pretentious. I'm on to my next word now, which happens to be 'absquatulate.' I'll be buggered if I can figure out how to fit that in to one of my posts, without sounding like a complete and utter prat.

Thanks again for your comments Shahid.

10:01 AM  
Blogger BBCD said...

The funny-ist-ish FAQ ive read in a while, i dare not do my own ;o)

6:01 PM  
Blogger Kate-A said...

Reading your blog was like dancing with words, (or is that wolves?). Either way it kept me alert.

;)

6:11 AM  
Blogger Mars said...

quite informational... and clever..lol..darn,I thought I'd ask for your email addy, but I see its already been done..

2:31 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Olive – this has to be the most refreshing blog I’ve read in some time. Your style which you claim to not know you had - is fantastic, yet honest, cynical, and insanely intoxicating in an extraordinarily intelligent manner.

Thank you for simply put- being you.

nic

11:06 PM  

Post a Comment

<< Home